Make sure you are comfortable together, but meet as soon as possible.

Our goal is to figure out what makes you feel most comfortable while prioritizing meetings if you have potential interests. I don’t like strict rules about dating transgender women, and I think the most important thing is to access your comfort level and make a decision in a powerful, open place. Some people rarely communicate online before meeting, some feel comfortable only after a phone call and text, while others want to stay in touch for weeks before meeting. There is no right way to be perfect, but the key is to be honest and trustworthy, to be honest and frank about your expectations, and to weed out people you don’t want to meet. Also know that waiting too long for a first date can be a disappointment and a waste of time, so it’s best to meet early. The longer you talk before meeting someone, the more likely you are to have delusional thoughts, high expectations, assumptions, and opinions about the person behind the phone or computer that will ultimately work against you. Although you can learn a lot about someone through online or telephone communication, the real test of chemistry and attractiveness is spending time together face-to-face.

Don’t let yourself be led(and don’t lead others).

It’s one thing to take the time to get to know someone before you make a plan for a trans date, but it’s not a good sign if the other person asks for a trans date but doesn’t take any action and the plan doesn’t materialize. Remember, you don’t have a real trans dating plan until you have specific plans and consent for your first trans date. Be polite, responsible, respectful, and don’t let potential transgender daters dangle in front of you or doubt that you’ll actually meet. For example, if you vaguely asked someone in your email that Tuesday to go on a trans date with you o Saturday night, but your potential trans date didn’t hear from you until Saturday morning to confirm the plans, then you probably didn’t have a trans date at all. If you end up getting a trans date, the person may spend Tuesday through Saturday wondering what the deal is, assuming you’re not serious about the trans date or feeling anxious. Don’t wait until the last minute to choose a time, place, and place for transgender people. Put in the effort and show interest where appropriate!

Online transgender dating etiquette on the Internet can feel complicated, but try to follow your instincts, make cautious decisions (not impulsive, anxious ones), and screen out potential red flags. Get involved in your message and stick to a trans dating plan to make sure you’re not only getting to a trans date, but also creating opportunities to meet people with similar values and relationship goals. Above all, be smart and know your value!

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